Now here is a woman we do not hear a lot about. By today's standards she seemed to have had a pretty warped life - married first to one uncle (father's half brother) and then to his half brother - by extension also her uncle, who divorced his wife so he could marry her. The whole divorce thing is a bit confusing as the Herods' father, Herod the great, had 5 wives - at least some of them seem to have been at the same time so I'm not sure why he would have had to divorce the foreign princess to marry his niece/sister-in-law. In any case it was not seen as proper for Antipas to take his brother's wife while his brother was alive and John the Baptist did not hesitate to tell him that. Herodias was not impressed and was quite vindictive about it, holding a grudge until such a time as she could arrange for John the Baptist's death.
It all seems very convoluted and complex. What is there to learn from this? Don't marry your uncle and if you do don't divorce him to marry another uncle? I don't think this is the message. Herodias seems to have been a somewhat unhappy woman. If she had felt secure and happy in her second marriage the presence of John the Baptist may not have bothered her so much. But maybe it would if she felt guilty about leaving her first husband. Or maybe she was somewhat shunned by the rest of the family because of her actions. Or maybe she was afraid her husband would get rid of her as he had his first wife. Or maybe she had been abused in her first marriage and was afraid she would be forced back to that husband. In any case there was something about John the Baptist's presence that nagged at Herodias and she was having a hard time tolerating it.
I have found that this has happened to me. When I was unsure of our house purchase I became overly critical of that of one of my friends - mostly because, at the time, I felt they got the better deal. When I question my hesitation to act and see another who did not hesitate succeeding - I feel a resentment that has nothing to do with the other person but may be focussed there. Or if I see someone getting away with something I got punished for, it irks me. It is sometimes the "what if"s that get to us. We let resentments and frustrations fester, disturbing our rest and spoiling the joy we could experience, instead of letting go and letting others, justly or unjustly, go happily along their way.
So what can we learn from Herodias? To let go of our grudges so we don't ruin/hurt ourselves and those around us. I'm not sure her daughter would have dealt well with having to dance for her step-father/great uncle nor with having to be faced with the freshly cut head of the prophet. In the Matthew passage it seems Herod was haunted by guilt for having had John beheaded. Herodias let her hate get to her and it affected her family and probably her life. Let us learn to move on.
The lectionary passages for this Sunday (17th) speak about letting go of the past and looking forward to the new that God has planned for us. This is really hard, but, if we are successful, can be so rewarding. So as we look forward to spring (even as more snow falls) and all of its new beginnings let us look forward to living in the present, in the gift from God that is today. Let us enjoy the beauty of the pristine whiteness while we look forward to the green that will , we hope, soon follow.
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